Because it was never my choice !!

The world and it’s irony, it surprises me!! So, Deepika Padukone was part of this video, which spoke about choices, and they said, how does it have anything to do with empowerment. Okay, let me define “they” here – my parents, my neighbors, my relatives, the aunty who lives across the street, the security guard of my society, the maid who comes to my house, the driver of the guy who lives next door, so on and so forth. But, what no one noticed is, the video is a state which every woman dreams of, to have the choice or freedom to decide what she wants in life.

I am a woman, and trust me; there have been millions of situations where I wish I was a man, and every time I think so, I am enraged at “them”, for making me feel so. I am 24, an MBA from a reputed college in India, earning 50k per month. But even today, my dad questions me for working late in office, he questions me for talking on the phone at night, he questions me if I have dinner with someone simply because I was hungry, he questions me if someone drops me home even if it means waiting another 45 minutes for the office cab, and all this because I am a woman, a girl  -  and no, I am not assuming this, when I asked him if his dad ever did all this when he worked for late hours in office, this was his response, I am not a woman, it’s okay for me to do all of that, but not for you, because you are of marriageable age, and no guy would want a girl who does all these things. Yes, this was the reason, that I did not have a choice, because being chosen by a guy for marriage, was always his privilege, and never a girl’s choice. My dad said that he gave me all the freedom till college, that he never questioned what I wore, with whom I went, where I went, but now, u need to get married, and hence u need to be controlled !! And there, it struck me, that what I thought were normal human rights, were actually an extra bonus for me, I can't have them in normal circumstances, I was just lucky, because I am a woman, and we don't have a choice !!

I was in love, and maybe I still am, with a guy who my parents will never accept, and neither will “they”, and so I have to give up on that, because “they” will outcaste me if I do, and so I let it go. I wanted to start my own business, but “they” said, I don’t have the right to dream, what if the guy doesn’t like it, what about your family, oh yes, I forget, the family is always the girl’s responsibility, the guy only gets in the bucks. And the funny part is, if I was a guy, my parents and even “them” would have easily accepted all of this, but just because I am a girl, I don’t have the choice to fall in love, to have dreams of my own.

“They” say, you are a fool, the guy will just use you, and throw you, but what if I have enjoyed the time too, OH MY GOD, how can I even say this, a girl never has a choice to enjoy, and if she does, she is labelled as a slut or a whore. I don’t have the choice to even decide my best friend, because if a guy is my best friend, then “they” will never accept it, because girls can’t have guys as friends, and never best friend!!

So now, for all those people, who asked, how is the video, got anything to do with empowerment, yes, I agree it has got nothing to do with empowerment, because the word “my choice”, was never even available for women,  it was always “their” choice, and will always be!!

Broken and Beautiful

It takes courage, not to fall, but to pick yourself and walk again! It takes courage to love each of your bits and pieces, to lift each piece of yours with patience, adore its beauty, put it all up together and move ahead.

How can broken be beautiful, U wonder?

Broken hearts are the most beautiful ones, just like how the smile on a scarred face is, because it comes with a story, a story of love and pain, and most of all, of courage, the courage to have loved, in spite of being hurt!

We are all broken, in some way or the other, but what makes the difference is how many pieces you let go each time you get up, because it is easy to let go of yourself, but difficult to love yourself, in spite of the cracks and the scars. Because, what we do not realize, is that it is the scars, which make us unique and beautiful.

I am sure we have all looked at a child and wished if we could go back to the innocence and naivety we had back then! But no, what we fail to see is that it is the pain that make us value the goodness even more!! There are thousands who will tell you that the world is of no good, hundreds will narrate stories of hatred and despair, stories which show no traces of love or kindness ! But no, do not let a few bad examples drive you! We were born to a world which raised both Hitler and Gandhi; it is us who decide which path to take! If there’s still a single arm in the world, which extends to help someone, it is proof of goodness and love! If there is a single soul who loves you, whoever that be, a mother, a father, a spouse, a sister, a daughter, a child, a friend; you know that love exists and how it feels to be loved! The power of love is still the same, be it a parent a spouse, or your best friend, do not let go of it, only because one person did not fulfil it, or maybe a few people in the world, seem to be losing it !

Look at each star in the sky, it looks so beautiful and amazing, but we all know that it is burning and the moment it stops, it will stop being beautiful! Look at a waterfall, it’s a scar on the face of the earth, but have you ever been lost, mesmerized in its beauty. Have you looked at hills and mountains, or oceans lakes, and adored the beauty of nature? Exactly, start looking at your own life in the same light, just like how dull the earth would be, if it was just a plain surface, that’s how your life would be without those scars that you have had!

So embrace each part of you, adore yourself, and be lost in your own beauty! There’s no greater joy, than feeling content and complete in your own self!